Thank You’s and Candy Tantrums

First, thank you for reading my blog- even when it gets really morbid and morose. Thanks for those of you who support me and help me through the ugly periods.

I did relapse on the opiates… not enough to get super high. But, it was a relapse nonetheless. I was able to pull myself together, thanks to my good friend beansycheese. Thank you for being there for me, even though you don’t need to be. I don’t think you realize how your words impacted me in the best way!

Blahpolar as well, I just want to let you know I think you’re a real rad blogger, and thanks for always having great advice for me.

Anyhoo, today was my first full day back at work. I had a fairly productive day. I kept having cravings all morning long- glancing at the desk cleaner. Alas, I didn’t even touch the can. Progress, they’d say.

I’m still a little shaky and foggy. Emotionally, I’m doing better- at least, depression wise. I’m having incredible mood swings. When I was first put on lithium 7 years ago, I remember intense angry episodes. I was so aggressive and had an almost nonexistent fuse.

Fast forward to my nearly 23-year-old self, dosed up with said Rx, I’m experiencing the same damn tantrums. I get so furious for no apparent reason. Today, I cried because I wanted candy. CANDY.

God bless America.

I’m excited to go to groups tomorrow. I really missed it today. It sounds funny, but I really missed checking in, listening to everyone, socializing, and just being there.

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3 thoughts on “Thank You’s and Candy Tantrums

  1. blahpolar says:

    Aw thanks and hugs and I love radiohead and that was a fab album I couldn’t believe they gave it away free and do you experience mixed episodes? Hmmm, so that’s what long sentences with no punctuation feel like. Yuck.

    Like

  2. ladymigraine365 says:

    Hey. Love your blog, so far, and Radiohead, Sylvia Plath, and you. Have had suicidal ideation and very serious depression, partner has near-bipolar PTSD, I have mixed issues with opiates as someone with emotion-based chronic pain. Very, very nice to meet you 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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